The Brian Diaries, Part 1: The Arguments I Had With My Mom I Regret Ever Happened!!!

I have something, Apart of me I want to release from my self. I did too many arguments with my mom that just comes out from nowhere over every little stupid thing. My mom goes to the store comes back with some food but not with about everything I want. But it's not her fault. I should of went with her all those times and pick out what I want my self. I did went with her about most of the time but I should of did harder. I'm the only one that seems to care about my mom. My brother could of never did that. Maybe in the good days he use too until he got to wrapped up in someone he calls girlfriend who is uncaring and unkind with no respect but her self. Family comes first in anything. My mom never trusted my brother. Most of the time I didn't ether. But what choice do I have. My mom can't help me no more. She's in a nursing home. The one and only person I relied on will be gone forever. I don't know if I'll ever have a chance to say good bye before she goes. I regret way too much of the past and things I have done. Life wasn't supposed to be like this. I'm just thinking, The stress in my mom build up over the years. Some may have been caused by among other things. But me, Is it me who caused her stroke ? And when I lose her is it me who killed her ? Oh, My god What have I done. If I caused it, I'm sure I'll be going to hell. I love you mom I always have. even if I didn't say it or never showed it I did. The truth is in writing. You're dear pride and joy. son Brian.